Guess what? Next Sunday is the day more non-Muslim American women are beaten by their spouses, live-in boyfriends and main squeezes than any other day of the year. What's the reason for all this marital mayhem? Why it's Superbowl Sunday. And of course, as it's taking place in Detroit, this Superbowl Sunday is bound to be more violent than usual.
To hide the 40 years of Detroit's urban decay caused by the 40-year rule of the Democratic Party, the Superbowl Host Committee came up with a great idea : The Winter Blast. The idea was to cover all the decay, rot, and general malaise with pure driven snow. Or rather, artificially pure driven snow made by snow machines trucked in from Montreal. Last year they did a test run. Guess what? It got snowed out.
This year, the snowmakers from Montreal began making snow last Monday. They need quite a lot of it because they're not only covering up the urban blight and turning Detroit into a "Winter Wonderland", but they also have to make a 200 ft long snow slide, a street filled with ice sculptures, and dogsled runs. The snow making has been a round-the-clock operation and will remain so until the start of the festivities. The only thing that could possibly throw a wrench into the Superbowl Host Committee's plan--besides a blizzard--is a warm spell. And guess what? Even as I type, the mercury is nudging the 40-degree mark. Yesterday it almost reached 50. And the local forecast calls for above-freezing temperatures through next Tuesday at least. True, these are the same savants who told us last year that we'd need 10,000 body bags in New Orleans, but I tend to trust them more about atmospheric conditions. After all, when the sun comes out it's kind of hard to blame George Bush.
The entire lot of Peperiums and Cards are piling into the minivan in just a few hours to tour the melting Winter Wonderland. The Card's Wife will have her camera. Check out Misspent's site for the photos.