Man About Mayfair
Sir Basil Seal
The Flying Weekend: Countdown
As you all know, when we last spoke I told you how I had left the preparation and organization of my flying weekend in the capable hands of the Countess...I had planned for a few friends to stay for the weekend and generally do as little as possible. As usual, my ingenious handling of the Countess came back to haunt me with a vengeance.
"Basil, Basil wo bist du?"
"Here I am my dear Countess, how may I be of service"?
"You can start by coming out of there and stop hiding behind your dirty books..."
"My dear, they are not "dirty books" they are antiques and I wish you would refrain from using that particular term...It has a somewhat different meaning here in the heartland..."
"I have no idea what you mean, they are old, dirty and smelly...How you can stand it I have no idea. Anyway, I have here the itinerary and schedule of events for the weekend festivities..."
"A what of the who"? What do you mean by festivities"?
"Stop asking silly questions, I have put together the schedule for the motorcade to retrieve Father EEM from the airport and the schedule, seating plan and menu for the banquet in his honor. We then have the school tour and festivities, the Bishop's reception and cocktail party, the field day and the formal dinner. It is all meticulously planned, and I must ask that you and St. John please try to stay out of the way and not embarrass anyone. You two will be responsible for collecting Mr. and Mrs. P and family and her friends from the airport. I have been in contact with Mr. Lout's office and he will arrive on his own on Thursday, he is renting an automobile. Make sure you are here to welcome him and show him to his room."
"Motorcade? Banquet? I believe, my dear that this was to be an informal gathering..."
"Obviously you were incorrect. Everything is set and I have already called Mrs. P and given her the details. Now, do you think you and St. John can handle your assignment without too much trouble"?
"Well, I suppose..."
"Gut, then that is settled. Father EEM will take your room and I have already had the Flash books removed from the shelves and more appropriate titles placed for Father EEM's reading pleasure..."
"Hey, wait a minute, I don't like it when anyone touches my books, and how do know that Father M is not a big Flashman fan"?
"Don't be silly, I am sure that you and St. John are the only two who read those silly things, and Father EEM is a highly educated man and a paragon of the Church. He has more important things to do than read the Flash books. And I hope you will not go into your lawn tennis Fred Perry act if someone wants to play. Not everyone wants to play 1930s tennis, so please do not annoy the guests with your whites, wood and Jack Purcell's rules."
"And very good rules they are...Let me tell you..."
"Nothing, nothing my dear Countess, I was just perusing this schedule and thinking of my wardrobe...Must do a little brushing and polishing before everyone arrives...Yes, it looks as if you have it all covered..."
"Gut, then memorize all of this and keep St. John away from the liquor cabinet please."
Humm...I wonder if anyone would think me rude if I were to be out of town on the weekend of my own party?