When we last met at the demands of Hillary, Anthony Weiener had shot a new commercial sans Huma saying 'quiting isn't the way he rolls', Huma rolled over agreeing to an extended vacation away from Hillary and Bill got rolled by agreeing to vacation with Hillary in the Hamptons.
Then as all was well, the latest edition of National Enquire rolled out:
"A sex tape that Monica Lewinsky recorded for Bill Clinton at the height of their scandalous affair has leaked, during which the former White House intern is heard planning a secret sexual rendezvous with the president and declaring she is 'too cute and adorable' to be ignored.
"On the audio tape obtained by The National Enquirer, Lewinsky at one point tries to seduce the commander in chief: 'I could take my clothes off and start… well… I know you wouldn’t enjoy that? I hope to see you later and I hope you will follow my script and do what I want.'
"Lewinsky, who turned 40 last week, made the three-minute, 47 second recording in November 1997 and addressed it to 'handsome.'”
"It was believed to have been destroyed years ago, but a copy was secretly made and has subsequently surfaced.
"Lewinsky is the only voice heard.
"On it, she tells the 42nd President: 'Since I know you will be alone tomorrow evening, I have two proposals for you, neither of which is you not seeing me.'
"Lewinsky then orders the leader of the free world to use his secretary, Betty Currie, as a go-between and plan the presidential schedule so they could covertly meet without a formal record of her visit.
“'Now the first thing that has to happen is that you need to pre-plan with Betty that you will leave the office at, I don¹t know, at 7, 7:30 so that everyone else who hates me that causes me lots of trouble goes home,' she tells Clinton.
“'Then you quickly sneak back and then in the meantime I quickly sneak over and then we can have a nice little visit for, you know, 15 minutes or half an hour. Whatever you want.'
"Lewinsky also bemoans how their previous '60 seconds' encounter 'was just not enough even though you did look very handsome.'”
“'Maybe we could go over and watch a movie together and just have kind of, I don¹t know, boxed dinners or something like that,' she says.
“'And then that way we don’t have to deal with the problem of me… of there being a record of me going upstairs and we can spend some time together and see a good movie. So I don’t know, those are two proposals and you can’t refuse me because I’m too cute and adorable and soon I won’t be here anymore to pop over.'
“'I’m hoping you will hear this and you will choose which one you want to do and go tell Betty and then she can call me and let me know so I don¹t have to stress out all day and I don¹t have to call her every two hours and bug her because, I know you will find this very hard to believe, but I can be a pain in the ass sometimes.'
"'I’m very persistent, but um… I really want to see you.'
"According to The Enquirer, Lewinsky originally played the tape for Linda Tripp — the woman whose secret telephone tapes of Lewinsky ultimately led to Clinton’s impeachment — on Nov. 20, 1997.
"The cassette was delivered to the Oval Office the next day, according to a report by the Office of Independent Counsel Ken Starr.
"The tape and other racy mementoes, including love letters Lewinsky wrote to Clinton, were obtained by an individual who was hired as a 'cleaner' by individuals close to Lewinsky.
"The source kept the sensational material private for the past 15 years and the Clintons reportedly thought the evidence had been destroyed.
“'First, I forgot to tell you that the Gingko Blowjoba, or whatever it’s called, was from me,' Lewinsky wrote in one romantic note to Clinton.
“'I also included those new Zinc throat lozenges which are rumored to be great.'
"In a series of pleading notes, a clearly distraught Lewinsky pestered Clinton to make time for her and begged him to explain why he ended their illicit romance.
"The Enquirer reports the emergence of the tape could torpedo Hillary’s expected run for the White House.
“'The Clintons thought this sex tape was dead and buried,' said one source. “'If this tape and other material are surfacing now, imagine what else must be out there?'
“'This could be just the tip of the iceberg and the most embarrassing ‘bimbo eruption’ of all for the Clintons.'”
Tune in tomorrow to learn it if there ever really was anything for Hillary or Huma to stand by...